PBN Blues Series: “I Want a Little Sugar In My Bowl” Nina Simone

As a vendor of various supplies for every sort of human need and condition, Pagan and Spiritualist business folk inevitably meet is the question of sex magick. Yessss, sex, that lovely passion that is shared by the majority of the human population. In all its forms, the desire for that physical form of release merits so many forms of potion and possible working that a shop could specialize, theoretically, on this area exclusively given the right place. In this case, we are discussing the magick for drawing sex.

But knowing what form of work is key. Your client may say they want romance, when in fact they simply want a night of fun. Or the opposite case may occur, and they ask for help in achieving the conditions to be ready for a fling, when what they truly long for is a committed relationship. While it is true that you are a merchant, it is good business to read your customer so that you recommend the right products for the situation.

So let us get to our scenario of the day.

All splash, no substance




Zoe P. comes into your shop in a rush of energy. She enthusiastically floats from candle to candle, shelf to shelf, looking at every item that even remotely seems to be related to love workings. The belly dance scarves and sensual oils join her overflowing basket and she bounces towards your counter. As you ring up her purchases, she starts to bite her lip and places her hand on the next to last item before it can be added to the total.



Being an experienced worker, you know that this is usually when the “extra” items are sought. You patiently wait for her request that you know is coming. She looks you in the eye with a wry smile and asks if you have any items specifically for sex. To be exact, she is looking for a way to get more sex from her partner, who has ceased relations with her for the last three months and counting.



Her façade of cheeriness begins to crack, and her voice drops a bit. Zoe P. tells you that not only has the sex stopped, so has all touching in her relationship. NO physical contact is taking place outside of the occasional hand holding and kissing. Her sex life, actually, is dead.



You look at her and tell her to seek a new partner. Being the all-knowing and benevolent shop-keep you are, you give her an attraction candle and tell her to find the picture of the nearest coworker and have at it. She should be busy in no time.



She hesitates, and buys your suggested item. You bag her purchases, satisfied that you have made a hefty sale for the day. You never see her again.

Tell me what you want, what you really really want


Zoe P. comes into your shop in a rush of energy. She enthusiastically floats from candle to candle, shelf to shelf, looking at every item that even remotely seems to be related to love workings. The belly-dance scarves, Love Drops candles,  and orange blossom oils join her overflowing basket and she bounces towards your counter. As you ring up her purchases, she starts to bite her lip and places her hand on the next to last item before it can be added to the total.





Being an experienced worker, you know that this is usually when the “extra” items are sought. You patiently wait for her request that you know is coming. She looks you in the eye with a wry smile and asks if you have any items specifically for sex. To be exact, she is looking for a way to get more sex from her partner, who has ceased relations with her for the last three months and counting.



Her façade of cheeriness begins to crack, and her voice drops a bit. Zoe P. tells you that not only has the sex stopped, so has all touching in her relationship. NO physical contact is taking place outside of the occasional hand holding and kissing. Her sex life, actually, is dead.

Zoe P. has really just laid it on the line for you. Because of the level of sharing she has opened between you, you cautiously ask her if anything has changed in the last three months. Was there a new job, possible infidelity, arguments, etc.? She tells you that recently, she lost a lot of weight — 100 lbs. Six months ago underwent a makeover for her 40th birthday. New clothes, wardrobe, hair color and cut, and a membership to a CrossFit training group has completed her transformation. Essentially, she is a new woman.





You ask her if her partner seemed to taper off their activities around the time of her transformations. Has this person begun to pull away?  Zoe P. thinks for a moment, and tells you that yes, they have. She then confides that as she changed, he seemed to become shy about letting her see him unclothed, and stopped taking photos next to her when they went out on the town.





You tell her that, of course, you cannot be sure but you feel that maybe her partner feels “unsexy” next to her new image. You suggest some things for communication and self-esteem be substituted in her order. Gentle reassurance, rather than brash one-off sex-pottery seems to be a wiser course for a long term goal. You also recommend some Aphrodesia oil, to kickstart things. To get things in the mood, you suggest she actually uses lyrics from I Want a Little Sugar In My Bowl by Nina Simone  as an incantation for her working with the Rose Quartz/Pan Incense set she adds to her basket.

Zoe P. finishes her purchase, now a very different set of items, and thanks you. The bounce has returned to her demeanor a bit, and the quickness of her steps staccato in the store. A very happy customer walks out of your door with a purchase that feels more “right” to her. But she still bought the hip scarf, of  course.